I woke up this morning
A’top the Christmas tree
The topmost branch was tickling me
In places you can’t see

All year I’ve rested in a box
Quiet, peace on Earth
Then early in December
My annual Christmas birth

I’m dusted off and polished
And hoisted up the ladder
Each year the tree gets higher
The humans just get sadder

Now I’m wedged against the ceiling
The artex is so rough
I’ve also got a fear of heights
I’ve really had enough

A spider’s come to see me
Across its ceiling web
It’s walking right across my face
A feeling that I dread

So get this Christmas over with
Dismantle this old tree
Put me back inside my box
Where I’ll sleep peacefully