In Denmark I had Kaffe and Kage,
In England that’s coffee and cake.
I once was the owner of thousands of Kroner
But found all the Danes on the make.
They even charged for tap water
At nearly two pounds a glass.
Everyone felt we were paying Dane Gelt.
It cost us to walk on the grass!
We met some guys from Australia
Who found things as pricey as me
And so they went over to Sweden
As they heard that the love there was free.
So I have returned home to England
Relieved to have got off the plane
And although I am poorer, I’ve never been surer
That there’s nothing quite like a Dane!