I’ll tell a tale of nightmares
Of spooks and Ghostly things
I’ll tell a tale of Hallowe’en
And fear that nightime brings

In Welsh it’s “ Nos Calan Gaeaf “
In English “ Hallowe’en “
Along the Anglo Borders
It’s something in-between

Jack-o- Lanterns, lit by candles
Pumpkins brought to life
These things hold no fear for me
They remind me of my Wife

Black and pointed Witches hats
Amongst the Stars unseen
Stealth Aircraft in the night sky
Elude the Radar screens

Witches in formation
Flying through the night
Broomsticks in the turbulence
A “ Broomstick Airways Flight “

So many Witches visiting
Shoulders crouched and bent
“ Bed & Breakfast’s “ booming
So many “ Brooms for Rent “

The shops are doing well
An advert “ Brooms for hire “
And firewood sticks are selling out
For Witches burnt by fire

They use this night for Weddings
To Warlocks preaching Doom
Hobgoblins introducing
The Devils “ Bride & Broom “

Then off upon their “ Honeygloom “
Where Earth & Hell don’t mix
A Witches RAF Flight
Squadron 666

My Mum-in-law goes missing
October every year
She tells us she’s on holiday
Do we believe her ? Yeah !!

My Wife’s Mother works part-time
Like Santa, once a year
I’m sure she works for “ Rent-a Witch “
Each day she “ Bends my ear “

So fear not on “ All Hallow’s “
And get down to the Pub
Protected by The Landlord
From Witches and their club

Keep drinking The Old “ Guinness “
A shandy for the Wife
An age old Magic potion
The “ Elixir of Life ! “